Hope everyone had a good Thanksgiving and safe travels. While I did indulge in a little Black Friday shopping (hitting up a few businesses on my ethical holiday sales list), I only bought two things. Instead, I spent most of the weekend doing the opposite: trying to get rid of stuff. For some reason, I felt the urge to purge. One thing I write about in my About page is how this blog is about my struggle between loving stuff and my desire to pare down. I hardly ever write about it, so I guess today’s the day I do.

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I grew up in a frugal immigrant family where we saved nearly everything because it might come in useful. My parents weren’t hoarders exactly, but they kept a lot of stuff. Our garage became the resting place for anything that they couldn’t let go of: college textbooks, pretty much every toy my siblings and I had ever played with, stacks of paper grocery bags, decor. It was a 2-car garage and at one point, they could only park 1 car in it because of all the stuff. I grew up with the same attitude until one year in college when I moved 5 or 6 times in one year. That quickly made me a believer in downsizing.

I fantasize about being a minimalist, but I still love things, especially well-designed things. And now that I’m more settled in one place, I can’t believe the amount of stuff I’ve accumulated. It’s a privilege, of course, to be in a position to have stuff. But we also live in a consumerist culture that is always enticing us to buy things.

Sometimes I feel overwhelmed by my stuff. Part of my brain is constantly trying to declutter. I read Marie Kondo’s book when it first came out and though I don’t like all her methods, I agree with the basic premise of it: you should only surround yourself with things you love. Her method of holding each object and asking if it “sparks joy” is something I was already doing in my own way. She promises that if you KonMari your home in one go (however long that takes), then you will only be surrounded by things that bring you joy and your life will change.

Well, I started KonMari-ing 3 years ago and I never quite finished. Books and music were not easy exactly, but I managed. The easy stuff for me is kitchen and clothing. I’m always reconsidering the items in my closet, actually, which is why I have a pretty active Poshmark store. But getting to a quality-over-quantity wardrobe is just one piece of the picture. I never got through the last stage of KonMari-ing: photos, letters, mementos from projects I’ve worked on, etc, the personal stuff that’s meaningful probably only to me. (If you have a good method of handling this kind of stuff, let me know!) Meanwhile, things slowly creep into the home.

So, I kicked a bunch of things out of my kitchen this weekend. That red vacuum coffee carafe? Used it once. Espresso cups? An impulse buy at Ikea because they reminded me of a trip to France, but I never make espresso. Those Orla Kiely for Target plastic glasses that I was so stoked to find? Getting a little worn; I have too many glasses anyway. Kondo says that you should thank your items for their service when you let them go and I like this part of her ritual. I removed about 20 items from the kitchen, but then I went and ordered placemats on sale from Target because I have a weakness for woodgrain patterns on textiles. Doh.

There’s also things I own that don’t spark joy, but it seems wasteful to replace them. For example: a pizza cutter that I bought from Target when I was in my early 20s. It’s cheap and not aesthetically pleasing to me, but it works fine. I don’t know what the pizza cutter of my dreams would look like. Is it even possible for a pizza cutter (or a wrench) to spark joy?

I also started going through my office, and that was harder. Parting with something that I think will be useful is still a struggle. For example: art supplies. I mean, the whole point of art supplies is to have them on hand so that you can use them, right? But I have supplies I haven’t used in years. What to do? I’m sure Kondo would tell me to throw it all out; I could buy those supplies again when I needed them in the future. But ugh, that seems wasteful. In the end I told myself I could only have 1 box worth of art supplies. So I removed some things, mostly frames, fabric, and gift boxes (which I’ve been saving because maybe I’ll need to put something in a box and I’ll have the perfect one.)

As the spark joy method doesn’t work with everything, I’ve gone back to my experience of moving 6 times in one year. Now I also ask myself: Is this something I would take with me if I moved to another city? More often than not, the answer is no.

I also make an effort to try to find the best use for the things I decide to discard. I hate to think of things just going to the landfill. Here in the Bay Area, we’re lucky to have some great places to donate your unwanted goods to. So, I’ll end by mentioning a few of them. In addition to the usual suspects, like Goodwill, there’s also:

Community Thrift – San Francsico – This local thrift store gives its proceeds to more than 200 local charities. You can even pick which charity you want your earnings to go to.

SCRAP – San Francisco – A nonprofit org that takes your art, craft, and office supplies and sells them for cheap to artists and teachers. They also give them away on a regular basis to public school teachers. (My pile of gift boxes and fabric will be going here.) SCRAP is also one of my favorite places in San Francisco to wander around.

East Bay Depot for Creative Reuse – Similar to SCRAP, but located in Oakland.

Friends of the San Francisco Public Library – San Francisco – They take books and media for their Big Book Sale, which raises funds for the public library.

St. Anthony’s – San Francisco – Donations of clothing to this charity go to its Free Clothing Program for those in need.

Freecycle – Informal email lists where people list what they are giving away or what they’re looking for. I’ve given away items here that are still in good working order but maybe aren’t in nice enough shape for the thrift store. Or they’re not things that would sell in a thrift store. My last giveaway was 30 identical jars.

If you know of more spots, let me know in the comments.